I hate asking my family for help, like HATE. I feel like “the baby” of the family who got “everything handed to her”, and (allegedly had it so much easier than my (male) siblings. Yes I realize that’s typical sibling shit to say, but piggybacked on an evangelical upbringing that essentially teaches that men are…
TLDR; Play Time is Vital and We All Deserve It
I took that quote to heart over the past week, and celebrated me, myself, and I for 9 days. I took off work, didn’t schedule any appointments, and made no commitments other than a pool party with friends and our kids. It was amazing. I got my nails and feet pampered, let an amazing massage…
My Tween Thinks I’m Cool
When I was 13/14 and swimsuit shopping with my mom, it was STRESSFUL. Being an evangelical, the restrictions were many and I couldn’t get the latest fashions because they were “immodest”. Yesterday I took B swimsuit shopping and it was FUN, for both of us. We were at Target, and they started talking to an…
Another Depressing Post Because My Life Is A Dumpster Fire Right Now and I’m Barely Coping
*Title in homage to Samantha Irby and her chapter titles (if you read this, I adore you) I’m in the middle of a massive fibromyalgia flare, which isn’t surprising given the amount of stress I’m under. At least I got to enjoy book club and some amazing Indian food before it hit; but let me…
Autism, Borderline Personality, and Generalized Anxiety All Walked Into a Bar
This should be our welcome mat. These past couple of weeks have been interesting (that’s me, reframing so that I’m not once again just complaining in my writings). I’ve come out of a low, and my anxiety has ramped up. 12, autistic, had been having a TOUGH time with emotional regulation, especially in the middle…
Green Flags
Ouch. I saw this on social media today and damn if it didn’t hit home. This is me. 100% I like to pretend that I’m low maintenance but nope, the truth is that I don’t believe that a partner would show up for me. (Especially with all the “no drama please” or “good vibes only”…
A Release
Two years ago, at the beginning of The Pandemic, B was in the midst of an emotional breakdown that led to long term hospitalization. Not only were they being hospitalized, the facility was out of state, and because of COVID no in-person visits were allowed. A total of 7 months of not getting to hug…
Too Tired to Title
There’s no light at the end of this tunnel, because this tunnel never ends. I’m an only parent, and I will always be their only parent. There’s no partner to tag in, when I’m totally depleted and exhausted in every sense of the word. No co-parent taking them every other weekend. No grandparents to take…
Who Are You?
I should watch this again “Who are you?” That’s a question I ask myself quite a bit. Being an only parent means that so much of my identity is based around my kids. But I’m more than that, though I frequently forget it. “Who are you?” What even IS that question? How can it answer…
Karen is a fucking liar
Spring 2021-Homeowner’s insurance left the area and I was told I needed new inspections to get a new policy holder. Got inspections, found out I needed a new roof, but I definitely didn’t have the money. Summer 2021-Leak in my crawlspace, led to finding out about a whole slew of damage from long term moisture…
Deconstructed Yoga Mom 