I hate asking my family for help, like HATE. I feel like “the baby” of the family who got “everything handed to her”, and (allegedly had it so much easier than my (male) siblings. Yes I realize that’s typical sibling shit to say, but piggybacked on an evangelical upbringing that essentially teaches that men are…
TLDR; Play Time is Vital and We All Deserve It
I took that quote to heart over the past week, and celebrated me, myself, and I for 9 days. I took off work, didn’t schedule any appointments, and made no commitments other than a pool party with friends and our kids. It was amazing. I got my nails and feet pampered, let an amazing massage…
Another Depressing Post Because My Life Is A Dumpster Fire Right Now and I’m Barely Coping
*Title in homage to Samantha Irby and her chapter titles (if you read this, I adore you) I’m in the middle of a massive fibromyalgia flare, which isn’t surprising given the amount of stress I’m under. At least I got to enjoy book club and some amazing Indian food before it hit; but let me…
Trauma, The Gift That Keeps On Giving
Recently I watched Evan Rachel Wood’s documentary titled “Phoenix Rising” on HBOMax, and it wasn’t easy. If you haven’t watched it and won’t find it triggering, I highly recommend watching it because it so clearly explains the grooming process, love bombing, brain washing, and the whole awful cycle. The bravery that it took for her…
Karen is a fucking liar
Spring 2021-Homeowner’s insurance left the area and I was told I needed new inspections to get a new policy holder. Got inspections, found out I needed a new roof, but I definitely didn’t have the money. Summer 2021-Leak in my crawlspace, led to finding out about a whole slew of damage from long term moisture…
The Shame of Poverty While Being a Single Mom
Watching and reading Maid by Stephanie Land resurrected memories of those rough couple of years after kicking out Preston. I was jobless (because he’d convinced me to quit my job and become his VA Caregiver, which never happened), living with C-PTSD from his decade of abuse, and he decided to just stop paying child support.…
Death by A Thousand Cuts
I’ve wanted to write for over a week, but my brain was too much…my brain doesn’t stop ever, unless I’m meditating, doing yoga, or smoking weed. All the time that I’m living life, in the back of mind there’s a list constantly running: When is B’s next orthodontist appt? Need to email the school again…
Sex, Drugs, and Justin Timberlake
“How can you show love, to those past versions of yourself?”, the question my therapist asked me 2 weeks ago. We’d been discussing my feelings of shame towards those younger versions of myself…those versions of myself that partied, had (mostly) safe sex, and even did some recreational drugs (not counting marijuana in that group)…ya know,…
Deconstructed Yoga Mom 